Thursday, April 9, 2009

A lesson in perspective (or rude awakening)

Here's a funny little episode just before Easter.

My 10yo daughter needed a new pair of shoes so we visited Spendless, our cheapest shoe store. And after trying several pairs, I decided on a nice little white leather pair with cute buttons on their buckles. But when we got to the car, Emma didn't seem completely happy. She grumbled, "I don't like those buttons. They look so old-ladyish to me." We all assured her that we didn't think so at all.

Then today we visited a friend of mine in her mid-30s who has little twin baby girls who Emma loves. This friend noticed Emma's new shoes and said, "I had a pair exactly the same but they've just broken and I was a bit sad." So on the way home I tried to comfort Emma. "See, April had exactly the same pair so they're not old-ladyish at all."

Emma gave me a sideways look that spoke volumes. She said, "Mum, you and April are old. I want to wear shoes that people aged 15 to 20 would wear." And she rattled off a list of young girls in the music or movie scene whose footwear she'd rather pattern. So there we have it. When we move into our 30s we have no idea that our fingers are no longer quite on the pulse until our daughters let us know. To me, old-ladyish shoes would be the slip-on type my mother, who is now in her 70s, would wear. A timely reminder that I've left the young, trendy generation some time ago. But when I think back to the angst I used to suffer then, I don't think I'd really want to be there.


  1. Yesterday my daughter and I saw a show where the husband describes why ladies don't like turning 40: their cheeks start to sag, they get a double chin, and they notice all the wrinkles on their face. He said eventually their whole face caves in.

    Though we laughed at the show, I turned 40 last October...and I can already see the signs...which means my face will cave in soon. :)

    You might be a little "old fashioned" in your tastes for clothes, but at least you aren't on this side of 40 yet, though it's really not that bad.

  2. No -- We are not old.
    I refuse.
    Our grandmothers are old.
    We are not.

  3. I can't help but laugh..I recall being in my teens and thinking how OLD my mother was(in her early 30's) and now here I am approaching my 40th in a couple of months, YIKES when did that happen? 40 seemed so old way back then, and now at nearly 40, I certainly don't feel old at all!

    My teen especially loves to point out how old and styless I am, yet funny thing is, he's the one stealing my music for his MP3 or MySpace profile...maybe I'm not as old as he thinks!

    Oh to be young and clueless again!

  4. I think your mistake was picking out the shoes for her. Every time I do that I end up returning the shoes. :o)

    Happy Easter!!!! Have a wonderful day!

    Peace and Laughter,

  5. I remember the first time the bagger boy at the grocery store called me "ma'am". When you don't feel old, it's hard to accept that others think you are. :o)

  6. I will be 46 in less than one month. Which means I'm 45 (there IS a difference!) Let me tell you - I don't feel all that much different on the inside than I did 10 years ago. My daughter is still at the stage where she says Mommy is sweet and beautiful. God bless her! By the time she thinks I'm old - well, she'll be right! Just kidding. Old is a relative term, that is for certain. And it's tough to hear it from your kids. Just wait - one day, the same scenario will play out between your daughter and her OWN daughter. And she'll call you to cry on your shoulder. You'll see!

    Happy Easter!